I am on the road – a lot – and although the courtesy wave isn’t a legal requirement, it improves the general mood of fellow motorists. Especially when I have spent hours in stop-start traffic only to have someone cut in front of me and squeeze their way into the non-existent gap in front of me. You know what I mean. We have all been there.
Not being shown an ounce of appreciation when you give way to someone determined to get in front can grind my gears. Not to mention all the other simply idiotic things people do on the roads.
You may consider the courtesy wave outdated, even non-existent. However, I believe this driving etiquette has not been left behind. It has simply evolved over the decades.
Many of us remember when the courtesy wave was like a normal one. It was that little hand gesture given to thank others on the road. For those who don’t remember, it required the dedication of an entire hand lift – right up in the air for all to see, almost like raising your hand to answer (or ask) a question.
When you consider the definition of hand waving, namely, moving your hand from side to side in the air, this was never really a courtesy ‘wave’. More of a courtesy ‘raise’, as really, that is what you are doing. You are raising your hand, not waving it. Yet it would appear that Aussies have considered how many muscles it takes to raise your hand and keep it there and determined it was no longer worth the effort. It is simply too exhausting. So the courtesy wave evolved.
The new wave allowed the driver to conserve energy while keeping their palm on the steering wheel and only lifting their four fingers. But why raise four fingers when you can only raise one?
The one-finger courtesy wave, which involves keeping your hand on the steering wheel and only lifting your index finger, became the new move. This was to be done in conjunction with a head tilt. This is my favourite wave because if you feel obliged to give someone a wave but don’t want to because they were jerks, you can raise your index finger and tilt your head slightly. Enough to appease your conscience in knowing that you did the wave, but not enough for the person to actually see the wave.
It wasn’t long before the wave evolved again, perhaps reflecting the true Aussie spirit of our road users, when the finger courtesy wave became ‘the finger’. How turning the back of your hand toward a person and putting your middle finger up could possibly be considered non-offensive is beyond me. Still, the sentiment is often returned with a similar gesture and sometimes a smile and some choice words.
Recently though, I have noticed that the courtesy wave is evolving again. We are willing to put the energy back into the wave, but this time, we raise our hand with the palm facing us. We have given up on even the slightest courtesy of lifting an index finger and moved to more of a WTF approach.
Now there are times when I am the person who needs to try and squeeze into a gap between vehicles. It is not because I woke up early and decided to irritate as many road users as possible. It could be that I am a little lost, didn’t realise the road ended or am teaching my daughter how to merge in heavy traffic. I am simply doing the best I can in the situation I find myself in. In this case, a WTFW (WTF Wave) is highly non-productive.
In my experience, those using the WTFW have jumped to the wrong conclusions about what is happening in the car in front of them. Sorry WTFW users, it is not all about you. However, even if it is evident that the other driver is a jerk, how does a WTFW better the situation? It is not a courtesy wave; it is an agitation wave and not in harmony with the great Aussie spirit of ‘she’ll be right, mate’.
So next time you are tempted to use the WTFW, give a courtesy wave instead. You are not condoning their actions or giving them a pass for idiotic behaviour; you are simply stating – she’ll be right, mate.
And it will be right. Sure, your blood pressure and stress levels just jumped to insane levels, but you and your passengers are safe. It was a close call, not a direct hit. Everyone is still breathing, which is most important. After all, if we are not breathing, nothing else matters.